Over the years, I have formed many friendships. Some have been long-lasting friendships, whilst some have faded away over time.
Some have been formed as a result of meeting someone through an existing friend at a party or something similar, where others have been around for so long, that no one can remember where it all started, or even why it has continued, other than the fact that it has just always been that way.
The whole concept of friendships can be viewed as either one of life’s necessities, or as a strange, almost alien concept, depending on your outlook.
Personally, I consider friendships as a major part of life.
Without friendships, a person cannot grow. A person cannot develop. A Person cannot build networks, learn new things or operate as a part of the greater community.
I see a friendship as a sort of relationship. When you think about it, to build a good friendship you both have things in common, you both have a similar sense of humour, and both of you develop a close bond, that is usually unbreakable, and will only grow stronger over time.
Some friendships are more like a stable relationship, in which they do not need constant attention and maintenance, picking up where they left off after months or even years apart. Others are more like an insecure, clingy and needy relationship; needing constant work, attention, phone-calls, or frequent catch-ups to keep them current and visible. Of course, there are also the workplace friendship, where you see certain people every day for eight hours, and before you know it, you have become friends.
In the past few weeks, a few of my work friends have left the office. Some have left for some well-earned rest & relaxation, with the intention of returning in the new year. Others have left for a sea-change; a change in scenery and even industries.
It can seem rather insignificant when someone from a workplace goes away on a holiday for a few weeks, however when the person or persons who are leaving the workplace are simply so vibrant, cheerful and entertaining, it is almost like the workplace has lost a part of it. The workplace definitely seems quieter, and a little emptier without them, however knowing that this is only a temporary situation is a comfort.
Other friendships can sometimes end in less-friendly terms, and also more abruptly. When these friendships end, it can sometimes feel like a relationship ending. One is left with questions like “why did it end?” or “I wish that things were back to the way they were”.
Over time, friendships are forgotten, whilst others remain in happy memories; a reminder of experiences shared and times gone by. These times will never change, as they have already happened, and have been shared with the ones we cared about at the time. The only thing that can change is the relationships with the people in the memories. People can come and go in one’s lifetime, but the memories remain.
The lost friendships are never without purpose, as from these, we learn life-lessons. We learn of tolerance, communication and even emotional maturity; simply by feeling the pain of rejection; which help with future friendships and their successes.
Knowing how something has failed is the first step to repairing it, and not allowing it to fail again. Without this knowledge, one could be completely clueless of the best way to address the situation, and therefore, the same mistakes could plague all future friendships. Knowing how things work, and indeed, how they have failed, is the only way to understand how to better ones self, and improve on other future friendships and relationships.
Friendships can be strong like rock, or fragile like glass, but all need the same level of care and devotion, or else they will all crumble and fail. Treating a friendship or a relationship with respect is the only way to nurture it, let it grow, and eventually, blossom into a life-long example of what two people can achieve between themselves.